How to Overcome Bad Habits:
Useful Strategies that Actually Work

How to overcome bad habits

Why Overcoming Bad Habits Feels So Hard

‘How to overcome bad habits?’ This is the question people struggling to quit bad habits ask most. 

Most individuals will blame themselves for their guilt and mistakes, thinking they’re not disciplined or that a negative identity defines them forever.

Here’s the reality: the fact that you fail to overcome bad habits has actually nothing to do with your personality. 

However, it involves a series of complex biological and psychological processes. That means it’s your brain and neurons that make changing seem difficult. 

So, I’m telling you this to ask you not to take things personally, because it’s not your fault.   

Let’s look at how bad habits work to understand them well.

The Science Behind Bad Habits: How Your Brain Builds Automatic Behaviors

Similar to building good habits, bad habits are created through a process we call ‘habit loop’, but in the opposite direction. 

The Habit Loop entails 3 stages: cue, routine, and reward. Yes, the brain connects them and turns these actions into automatic behaviors over time.

Let’s picture a real-life situation to have a better picture:

  1. An individual hangs out with a group of long-term smokers (receiving a cue). 
  2. He gets affected by them and starts smoking (doing a routine).
  3. Eventually, he gets addicted to smoking. He feels relaxed and confident with a cigarette in his mouth (Achieving a reward)

See how the process goes step-by-step? And you’ll be wondering why at this stage.

The reason someone can’t resist the temptation of doing something is because of dopamine. It secretly prompts your brain to repeat an action, triggering craving.

That’s where repetition comes from, where the negative habit sneaks through the conscious control, and eventually automates the act. 

Here’s an interesting fact. According to research, a new behavior takes roughly 66 days to become automatic.

What People Who Successfully Change Do Differently

What successful people do to overcome bad habits

Every successful entrepreneur and businessman actually has one thing in common: their strong, resolute mindset. 

Some may think that successful people were born disciplined and that determination is in their blood. 

But the truth is, it isn’t about the personalities that let them grow big. It’s that they’re willing to do boring, monotonous tasks, even though they don’t feel like it. 

Simply said, they do things most don’t want to. They show up consistently in their routine to achieve a specific goal. 

The reason I am telling you all this is that others can do it; we can do the same. The first step is to stop comparing and start small with no excuses.

Eventually, great things will come your way when you push beyond your boundaries to make changes, even if they are small. But that’s okay, because they add up little by little!

Identify Your Habit Triggers Before Trying to Overcome Bad Habits

Identify habit triggers to overcome bad habits

Observing triggers is essential to overcoming bad habits. Without completing that step, it’s challenging to stop a specific negative behavior. 

The first step is awareness. You should specifically identify the root causes that keep you trapped in the bad habit loop. Without it, the effort will be all for naught. 

There are 5 common habit triggers we should focus on:  time, location, emotional state, people, and preceding actions. 

Then, observe your day-to-day routine, preferably 1 to 2 weeks at a time, and record what you do and how you feel after doing it on a piece of paper. 

You can spend 5 to 10 minutes reflecting on your behavior and considering the triggers behind a bad habit.  

Here are some of the example questions that you can ask yourself while going through the thinking process:

  • I always waste most of my time scrolling on social media after waking up in the morning (time). Is it because I feel bored (emotional state)?
  • Why am I always playing on my phone? Is it due to phone notifications that prompt it (a preceding action)?
  • The reason you often hit the bar and spend your money buying alcoholic drinks is to impress your friends (people)? 

After finding out the exact trigger, it will be easier to take a helpful action, such as placing your phone in a locked box, to get out of the loop.

Replace, Don’t Remove: The Secret to Overcoming Bad Habits Long-Term

Replace bad habits with good ones

It’s challenging, yet nearly impossible to eliminate a bad habit because it will rebound and come back to you after a certain period if you’re thinking of stopping it. 

Let’s say someone has been smoking for 20 years. And one day he tells himself, “I will quit smoking today’. The interesting fact is that he does succeed. 

Unfortunately, he fails to resist the craving again and starts enjoying cigarettes after 1 month of being determined.

The reason is that a specific negative habit has been with him for many years, which he naturally does, so it’s hard for him to remove immediately. 

It’s the exact thing that has become part of his life routine that he wouldn’t miss for a day.

Thus, here’s the effective solution: substitute the bad habit with a good one. Yes, elimination is out of the question.

When replacing a bad habit with a good one, it tricks your brain and every body part into passing the alert system, allowing it to recognize the good habits.

For instance, I used to like eating junk food whenever I felt bored or stressed. Then, I realized it was detrimental to my health, so now I treat fruit as my snack when I feel peckish.

That’s how I managed to fool my brain, because apples and chips are both crunchy!

Start Small: Why Tiny Changes Beat Big Goals Every Time

Here’s a tricky part: when a person sets a huge, unrealistic goal for himself, hoping to achieve it in a day or two. The result will be crystal clear: fail instantly. 

I’m the one who did that back in 2022. I thought of quitting all social media platforms and was confident I would win the game. 

I deleted all social media apps, such as Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok, wanting to stay away from comparison and distractions straight away. 

However, it couldn’t last more than 4 days, and I gave up because of the irresistible temptation. Eventually, I downloaded the apps back to enjoy. 

And that’s the experience I faced. To avoid repeating the same mistake, you should keep the act of change small and simple. 

By doing so, you won’t feel highly pressured and overwhelmed by a big objective that looks like an enormous mountain. 

Here’s the helpful tip: Embracing the spirit of getting 1% better than yesterday is surely enough! That’s what your brain favors most, and doesn’t feel stressed.

After finishing tiny goals, be sure to celebrate them, such as treating yourself to coffee from StartBuck. That’s how you keep the motivation going strong. 

Like me, instead of taking a big leap, I gradually reduced the time spent on social media day by day. And when I succeeded, I allowed myself to watch a movie at the cinema. 

Not to brag, but my phone doesn’t have a single social media app, and I manage to use my precious time on other meaningful things, like reading books. 

See how the progress looks achievable? Make your goal as small as possible until your mind does not treat it as a discomfort or a heavy task. 

Micro changes may look slow and take a long time. But they will bring tremendous success if you’re willing to be patient. Every step counts!

How Environmental Design Makes Overcoming Bad Habits Easier

Disciplined actions done by a person bring success and help him achieve his goals, so it’s the environment he is in. 

Good surroundings and discipline are interrelated and mutually supportive. Without a proper, positive environment, it will be difficult for an individual to change. 

That said, discipline is the bridge between your goal and accomplishments, helping you stay consistent and on track.

Let’s think about your personal space in daily life. Have you come across certain environments that make changing a habit an arduous task? 

Picture a situation where you’ve decided to focus on reading books in your free time to become a better version of yourself. 

However, your room is full of gaming devices that you bought, and that’s exactly where distractions come. As a result, it will cause us to lose concentration,  and it’s a sort of addiction.

The simplest way to do it is to move all the devices out of your room and keep them somewhere to create a distraction-free environment.

By doing so, it supports discipline, which is an important piece of the puzzle.

This may sound harsh, but most of the time, changes require courage and directness. Start small today, and you’ll see the difference later. 

Why Motivation Fails (And What Actually Keeps You Consistent)

Motivation stimulates you to take the first step and execute a goal. 

However, fully relying on motivation is not an ideal strategy for achieving long-term goals. 

Indeed, it makes someone stop pursuing when motivation fades away.

Doing things with motivation means letting emotions control. It seems like success at first, but it’s just the heat of the moment in disguise.

That said, consistency is key to making your dreams happen in real life. Rather than having emotions take charge, we should pay attention to the system that goes stronger.

With a reliable system, repeating a task until you overcome a bad habit becomes easier. You’ll continue doing it day by day, even though there are days you don’t feel like doing it. 

It doesn’t matter how long it is,  it could be months or years, but there will be one day when you thank your own effort, time, and determination, when looking back.

Let’s take one of my friends as an example. He was used to playing mobile games and watching drama until 3 in the morning every day.

One day, he felt he was living a meaningless life daily without direction. So, he came to me, seeking advice. 

After I heard about the exact problem he was facing, I said,’ Why don’t you start with a little action first? 2 to 5 minutes a day will be more than enough.”

Then, my friend decided to consider my advice and give it a try, by starting with 5 minutes first (not more than that). 

After a month, he manages to read a book for at least 25 minutes every day, instead of wasting his time on the phone. He’s been sticking to this habit until now. 

The Real Difference Between Temporary Change and Lasting Change

There are 2 types of changes for breaking bad habits. And the truth is, lasting change can be hard to conquer, but it offers long-term benefits. 

Here’s a table that shows how both temporary and lasting change differ. 

 

Temporary Change 

Lasting Change 

Sustainability

Short-term and can be void.

Long-term, permanent habits

Root

Focused on getting quick results by conducting new behaviors. 

Focused on achieving a desired identity.

Ease of reversal

Reversible. 

Embedded in our behaviors, and it’s irreversible. 

Source of motivation

 

External causes, like social peer pressure, fear, and lack of confidence.

 

  Internal drive for growth. 

Example

Intensely studying a language only for tests. 

Learn a language every day and treat it as part of your routine. 

 

It’s easier to see a fast, clear outcome that you want in a short time, but it doesn’t last as long as you think.

On the other hand, it’s a long journey to achieve a lasting goal because this requires a positive mindset, a sustainable system, and consistent repetition.

But, tell you what, your patience and time will be worth it throughout the self-growth journey. 

Common Mistakes People Make When Trying to Overcome Bad Habits

As humans, it’s normal to make mistakes in every part of our lives. That means that mistakes also occur during the process of overcoming bad habits. 

The following are the frequent mistakes that happen:

  • Overlook the power of gradual, small changes.

Done is better than none. A small, actionable change every day compounds and makes progress in stopping a bad habit.

  • Want to get things done and complete a difficult objective in a few days 

Most people love overnight success, and instantly overcoming a bad habit often causes exhaustion. So, being patient and consistent is key. 

  • Prioritize perfection

People give up right away after making a mistake, such as breaking their streak. They feel like their effort are in vain. In reality, it’s still there and keeps rolling.

  • Prefer motivation over system.

People tend to wait for motivation to do something, and stop when it fades. Thus, a system is necessary, like breaking down main goals and creating a supportive environment. 

Hence, overcoming bad habits is about trial and error. It’s not a big deal to make mistakes. Just treat it as an experiment, and you’ll enjoy the process.

How to Stay on Track After You Slip (Because Everyone Slips)

Things don’t always go as planned. There are ups and downs, and unexpected things often occur. 

We may miss a day or two on our schedule, and that’s totally fine, because it doesn’t mean you lose the whole game. 

As mentioned above, being a perfectionist hinders your progress. So, treat it as nothing and move on to get back on track immediately without looking back. 

Let’s imagine a situation. You want to overcome a bad habit of overeating, and aim to lose a few pounds to get in shape, and regular exercise is one of the ways. 

Part of your breakdown goal is jogging for 1 hour. Sadly, something urgent comes up at work, so you don’t have time for exercising. 

You may feel down in the dumps.  But that’s okay, because it doesn’t define who you are, or one missed day doesn’t mean you’re a lazy or undetermined person. 

Just forget it and continue the routine on the next day, by closely focusing on recovery to keep the momentum going.

Build an Identity That Makes Good Habits Feel Natural

Before trying to overcome bad habits and build good ones, reflect on a specific identity you want to be. 

It’s the foundation of behavior, and a significant step that can’t be ignored, before you think about stopping bad habits. 

Ask yourself, ‘What kind of person do I want to be?’ Then your goal and a series of actions follow. 

Whether it’s becoming a successful businessman who makes the bank or an individual with robust discipline, every identity you long for is waiting for you.

The sky’s the limit, and nothing is impossible if you’re willing to step out of where you are currently and change.

Hesitate no more. Not tomorrow, not next week, but today. Start with a little today, and your future self will thank you.

If you’re thinking about starting a new habit, make sure to check out our related post on how to build good habits with a detailed step-by-step guide

 

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